Sami Kadah - Thoughts From A Room Without Doors
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Number 127

2/2/2019

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566
667
788
899
665
433
321
The number of views
Rises and falls
Like the tides of my emotions
I want to keep you reading
I do not always have something to say
I do not always have time to reflect
Because one cannot be reflective
When the water is three feet high
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Number 126

2/2/2019

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Being between
Two flames
Is hot
And sweaty
I know
My family
Is flammable
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Number 124

1/3/2019

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I think like you but I feel so much more intensely
I don’t know if it is the autism or if it is me
It hurts
It deprives me from experiences
Like dissonant music
Or dramatic films
I wanted to listen to Stravinsky
But I could not
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Number 123

12/20/2018

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Mixed emotions madly mingle
Like drunken soldiers do
What dancing at bar-mitzvahs
With elderly couples
Yes emotions take up too much space
And often fart in public
They make your face turn red and rosy
And argue with each other
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Number 124

12/20/2018

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I get intense cravings
I crave sweets
I crave salt
I crave spice
I become completely out of control
In those moments
I surrender to my urges
Just like a dog
Or like flames
I destroy everything in my path
I watch this unfold
Like a pilot watches his plane go down
Through a dense forest
As I watch
I become furious at myself
Full of burnt ashes
Destined
For the object
That brought me to this place
Only then
When the boy has got his cookie
When the cashier check clears
And the pilot regains
Some sense of certainty
Do I re-arise
Fully aware
Nihilistic
Narcissistic
Blue
Swollen
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Number 122

12/15/2018

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The sunny days in late autumn
Are likely a symbol
For the duality of my existence
This, my pen, is radiating
Giving life to the prickly vines
Giving warmth to the wandering owls
In their nooks inside my mind
The other
The creaking cold
Giving form to all the snake holes
Like gravity
Like death
Tried and true
Year after year
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Number 121

11/29/2018

2 Comments

 
I took a brief break from writing
I let my words marinate
Like yogurt on meat
They were absorbed slowly
I examined the events from my childhood
I felt the raw pain of uncleansed wounds
The uninhibited wildflower
And then I imagined what could be
And then what was
Seemed to drip away
2 Comments

Number 119

10/25/2018

1 Comment

 
The family is here and I am thrilled
To feel connected
To feel a part of something
Is like a warm blanket
On a frigid fall afternoon
Like the pop of fresh kernels
The moment the sun lays its dreary head
Dreaming of what is to come
What remains
And what is
1 Comment

Number 118

10/20/2018

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My brain has turned to dense mud
My limbs like stuck branches wont budge
The air like jelly
My blubber body grumbles
I am tired today
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Number 117

10/18/2018

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I have some hope today
I thought hope flew away
When the rocks fell towards the sky
See I couldn't see
That as they left me
They were heading towards the sun
And though I am behind
Fatalistic as it seems
The fact that we are all headed in the same direction
Is a comfort
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